Today, in
our study of the Sermon on the Mount, we’re going to read about Jesus touching
ever-so-briefly on the subject of divorce. I’m sure the epidemic of divorce in
our country is well-known to you, but I think we can take an interesting look
at its history by looking at the history of the TV show Divorce Court. That show first came on the air in 1957. Now, I
think the fact that a producer thought people would even watch such a show
reminds us that divorce was such a novelty at that time. A show about divorce
proceedings would tap into people’s curiosity about something that wasn’t very
familiar to them.
But as
divorce became more common in our country, Divorce
Court’s ratings fell. It survived until 1969, but was cancelled through all
of the 1970’s. It was revived in 1985, but was cancelled again through most of
the 1990’s. It was revived again in 1999 and has managed to stay on the air
from that time until today, but there’s no telling how many people we would
have to ask before we found someone who deliberately chooses to watch that
show. People don’t need to watch a TV show about divorce proceedings today
because sadly, too many people have lived through a divorce themselves.
Jesus’
words in this section are words that our culture today desperately needs to
hear. Later, in Matthew 19, Jesus would be asked specifically about divorce by
the Pharisees, and He made a statement in that passage that is an excellent
summary of God’s perspective on this subject: “What God has joined together,
let not man separate.” That is God’s desire, and it should be our goal.
As we study
verses 31-32 today, we’ll focus first on the emphasis of Jesus’ teaching, then
we’ll look at the exception to His teaching that He Himself mentions in v. 32.
1. The emphasis of Jesus’ teaching—Divorce
followed by remarriage is adultery
Let’s begin
to read through these verses. The introductory statement that Jesus uses,
especially when you read it in Greek, makes it clear that He is continuing the
same train of thought from the previous verses. In those verses he told us that
lust in the heart is the same as adultery in God’s eyes. Now, if I may
paraphrase, its like Jesus is saying, “While I’m on the subject of adultery,
let me mention something else that God considers to be adultery,” and He goes
on here to mention divorce and re-marriage.
In v. 31,
He says, “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife,
let him give her a certificate of divorce.’” That statement of the
Pharisees’ teaching is based on Deuteronomy 24:1-4, but it is actually a
misrepresentation of that passage. Moses had prohibited a situation in which a
divorced and remarried woman might return to her first husband if she was
divorced again or if her second husband died, but the religious leaders had
become more interested in the procedure of divorce that Moses mentioned there.
Moses really had not intended to discuss when divorce might be permissible, but
that’s what the debate became among the religious leaders.
In Jesus’
day, the situation regarding divorce was much like it is in our own culture
today—divorce was increasingly common, and divorces were granted for very
trivial reasons. The religious leaders’ concern was simply to make sure that
divorce proceedings were carried out properly, but Jesus reminds us that God’s concern
was much different. So He says in v. 32, “But I say to
you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual
immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman
commits adultery.”
Jesus took
a wide-angle look at his culture and announced that people were committing
adultery all over the place, because they had been taught to simply make sure
that the paperwork for divorce was filed properly. The marriage bond had become
something that could be dissolved almost on a whim, but Jesus announced that
those who treated their marriage in such a way, leaving one and entering
another in such a casual way, were actually committing adultery in God’s eyes.
What a lesson that we need to learn today! When marriages
end because of “irreconcilable differences” or because “things just didn’t work
out,” we need a clear reminder of God’s opinion on the subject. To treat
marriage in such a casual way is an offense to the God who designed it, and we
actually commit adultery when we use our own rationale for dissolving our
marriage bonds and entering a new relationship. When we use a rationale for
divorce and remarriage that God does not permit, we can call ourselves ex-husbands
and ex-wives, but to God, we are adulterers and adulteresses.
Now Jesus
language in v. 32 seems a bit strange. Why does He say,
“everyone who divorces his wife…makes her commit adultery?” Jesus was
assuming that the woman would enter a new relationship, which was the most
typical result of divorce at that time. In the Jewish culture, only a husband
could initiate a divorce, and the prospects for a divorced woman were very
bleak. Remember, this was not a time when a woman could really get a job on her
own outside the home to support herself. She could try to return to her
parents’ home, but there was no guarantee that they would receive her back. She
could beg, but of course, that is very unpredictable. She could try to earn her
own income, but you can imagine what kind of profession that might require. Most of the time, a divorced woman would
enter a relationship with another man, and Jesus said that in that situation,
both the woman and the other man would be committing adultery.
I think it
is very important that we allow this emphasis of Jesus to sink in lest we move
too quickly into a discussion about the exception that He mentions here. As
soon as we start to talk about an exception, our sinful hearts will try to find
ways to make the exception bigger and bigger. That’s exactly what the religious
leaders in Jesus’ day had done. The Old Testament mentioned a divorce procedure
as a detail of a larger scenario, but the people took that detail and ran with
it.
The
possibility that we might commit adultery through divorce and remarriage should
provide a strong push away from divorce in any situation. That is the real
emphasis in Jesus’ teaching. We should not search for exceptions; instead, we should
allow these words to push us away from divorce in the same way that the
previous passage pushed us away from lust, since the outcome for both can be
exactly the same—adultery.
With that being said, Jesus does mention an exception to his
teaching in v. 32—a situation in which divorce and remarriage would not be
condemned as an instance of adultery. Those words are just as authoritative as
everything else that Jesus said and everything else the Bible says, so we can
safely act upon them. We could state the exception like this…
2. The exception to Jesus’
teaching—Divorce followed by remarriage is not adultery when adultery led to
the divorce
Remember
again that in that culture at the time, only a husband was allowed to initiate
a divorce. What Jesus is saying is that if a woman was put away by a husband
who was engaging in adultery, God did not consider the innocent woman to be an
adulteress if she got remarried. This exception makes sense in light of
Israel’s laws and history.
In the laws
that God had given to the people of Israel through Moses, adultery was supposed
to be punished by execution. For example, Leviticus
20:10 says, “If a man commits adultery with the wife of his neighbor, both the
adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.” This law is
repeated in Deuteronomy 22:22—“If a man is found lying with the wife of another
man, both of them shall die, the man who lay with the woman, and the woman. So
you shall purge the evil from Israel.”
If the
people had obediently carried out that command, it would have clearly put an
end to the innocent spouse’s marriage because his or her spouse would be dead.
The innocent spouse would thus become a widow or a widower, and such people had
always been allowed to remarry under God’s laws. So in that situation, there
would have been no confusion—the innocent spouse’s marriage would have ended
with the death of their spouse, and thus he or she would have been free to
remarry.
But the
people of Israel had never consistently carried out the death penalty for
adultery, which resulted in confusion—as sin always does. What was the innocent
spouse supposed to do now? They were now divorced, but their spouse was still
alive. Would they be committing adultery if they got remarried? I believe the
exception that Jesus mentions here was meant to cut through that confusion and
tell us that the innocent spouse was free to remarry after the divorce had
taken place.
Now, we as
a community of Christians can also create confusion about divorce and
remarriage if we fail to follow God’s commands. We don’t live under the laws of
the Old Testament today, so we are not to enforce a death penalty for adultery,
but God has given us clear instructions on how to deal with a person in our
church who might commit that sin. Matthew 18:15-20 outlines a process of loving
confrontation that we are to follow in an effort to lead that person to
repentance. But if that person will not repent, Matthew
18:17 says, “let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector”—in
other words, someone who is outside the family of God. We’re not supposed to
hate that person, but to bring clarity to the decisions that we need to make as
a church, we are supposed to consider that person to be an unbeliever.
At that
point, the Bible’s teaching on marriage in 1 Corinthians 7 becomes applicable. Let’s
turn there together so we can read vv. 12-16. This letter was written by the
Apostle Paul, and he begins this section by saying, “To
the rest I say (I, not the Lord).” All that Paul means by that statement
is that he’s about to touch on a scenario that Jesus had not specifically
talked about during His ministry on Earth. Let’s read his words [READ vv. 12-13].
Now when
Paul writes that the unbelieving spouse is willing to live with the believing
spouse, surely he means more than “inhabit the same house.” I believe he’s
saying that if you are married to an unbeliever, if your spouse is willing to
honor his or her marriage vows to you, you should be willing to honor your
marriage vows to your spouse. But then beginning in v. 15, Paul discusses the
scenario in which the unbelieving spouse is not willing to honor his or her
marriage vows [READ vv. 15-16].
So, if
someone in our church is abandoned by their spouse, whether that spouse is
pursuing adultery or has some other motivation, I believe the innocent spouse
is free to be divorced and to remarry if they desire to do so. To bring this
back into the context of adultery, if someone in our church commits adultery,
we are to lovingly confront that person to help them come to repentance. But if
that person refuses to repent and persists in adultery, we are to consider that
person to be an unbeliever. Then, on the basis of this passage in 1 Corinthians
7, we should allow the innocent spouse to get a divorce and to remarry if they
desire to do so.
This
exception mentioned by Jesus in Matthew 5 is divinely authoritative; thus, it
gives us a basis as a church to act with clarity in situations of adultery. But
we should never forget that God’s basic assessment concerning marriage is this:
what God has joined together, let not man separate. As Christian spouses, we
should realize that there is no scenario in which we could get a divorce that
would not be the result of one of us directly disobeying God. If husband and
wife are both obeying God, there is no scenario for divorce—but happily, there
doesn’t need to be one in that situation! God does deal graciously with an
innocent spouse who is abandoned by a sinning spouse, and we need to
acknowledge that so that we don’t put the innocent spouse in a bind, but may
God help us all so that there would never be another divorce among Christians.
Rather, may our marriages be what God wants them to be—a beautiful picture of
the love and respect that exists between Jesus and His bride, the Church.